Hands To Heaven
by Remember How I Used To Be
Summary: Neji is sent on a mission with the knowledge he is not likely to return. He must leave behind his young civilian wife, knowing he probably will never see her again. NEJIxOC SONGFIC


**Summary: Neji is sent on a mission with the knowledge he is not likely to return. He must leave behind his young civilian wife, knowing he probably will never see her again. **

**Song: Hands To Heaven**

**Artist: Breathe**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Neji or any of the other characters except for Ayano. Nor do I own the song used. I am merely a poor writer that thought these two went together nicely. **

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_**As I watch you move, across the moonlit room  
There's so much tenderness in your loving  
Tomorrow I must leave, the dawn knows no reprieve  
God give me strength when I am leaving...  
**_

Neji gazed tenderly upon his wife as she appeared in the doorway of their bedroom. She had just returned from a meeting with the Fifth Hokage. The look in Ayano's eyes made Neji's throat tighten painfully.

"Why," She whispered softly as her voice trembled on the brink of tears. "Why you?"

The Hyuuga gathered his wife in his arms and carried her gently to the bed.

"Because everyone else failed." He replied just as softly. He held her close to his chest as he tried to hold back a rising feeling of fear.

Tsunade had purposely not given Neji any especially dangerous assignments for quite some time after he had married a civilian of Konoha. Now she had no choice but to give Neji an assignment that could very well cost him his life. Everyone sent before him had failed and perished. Kakashi and Sakura, Kurenai and Hinata, Jiraiya and Naruto, Shikamaru and Choji, Gai and Lee were just a few of those who had died in the attempt. Neji had no idea how Tsunade expected him to succeed when even one of the Legendary Sannin died in the attempt. Jiraiya had a reputation for being virtually impossible to kill. He had often boasted that he'd only been close to death twice in his life, both times through faults of his own. Even the presence of Naruto during the battle had not saved either of them. Both of them had died as well as all of the other teams sent out after them. With the deaths of so many powerful shinobi hanging over the mission Neji was certain that even if he completed the mission he would die from his wounds.

Ayano gazed into his pupil-less eyes. "The Hokage said that your target was weakened by all of the other attempts. She told me that you have a better chance than anyone else had."

"Perhaps," Neji said softly, "Pray to the gods that I may return to you one day." He gently cupped her chin in one hand and kissed her.

Neji needed Ayano's touch. He needed her to help him through the night. Whatever the next few days might hold, he did not want to think about it. Her love helped him forget every trouble he had. One last time she would calm his fears and make him feel like nothing could ever happen to the two of them.

_**As we move to embrace, tears run down your face  
I whisper words of love, so softly  
I can't believe this pain, it's driving me insane  
Without your touch, life will be lonely**_

As Neji moved to hold Ayano tears began to stream down her cheeks.

"Everything will be all right," He whispered in her ear, "I'll come home safely and we'll live to see our children's grandchildren."

"Promise?" She asked as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"I promise." Neji's throat tightened even further, refusing to let any more sound escape. The pain in his heart was nearly unbearable. He could hardly breathe.

He ran one hand through her hair as he drew her closer to his body if that were even possible. His lips found hers once more as he drew her gently onto the bed beside him. Neji couldn't imagine what his life would be like without Ayano and he didn't want to imagine it without her.

So raise your hands to heaven and pray  
That we'll be back together someday

Ayano sighed softly as her husband lay beside her, exhausted. "I love you," She whispered breathlessly in his ear.

"And I love you," Neji replied, his lips brushed softly against his wife's cheek as he placed a kiss at the corner of her mouth. He ran his hands down her body, trying to etch every curve into his mind.

Long pale arms snaked about Neji's neck as Ayano drew him close to her.

"Don't leave me." Her voice was soft and pleading.

"I have to go, but not until morning." Neji touched Ayano's lips with his fingertips, "Until then, we are together." He brushed a strand of her long silvery-gray hair from her throat and kissed the spot his fingers had touched.

_**Tonight, I need your sweet caress  
Hold me in the darkness  
Tonight, you calm my restlessness  
You relieve my sadness**_

_**  
Morning has come, another day  
I must pack my bags and say goodbye... **_

Small tendrils of sunlight slipped into the bedroom and lit upon the two entangled forms upon the bed.

Neji gazed with great sadness at the window. It was time. He slowly drew himself away from the woman he loved.

Ayano awoke as the pressure of her husband's touch vanished from her body. The sunlight registered in her mind and she began to weep softly.

For a moment Neji embraced his wife. "I will always love you, no matter what happens." He got up from the bed and dressed quickly in his ABNU uniform.

His pack was light, no one expected him to return. Neji held the pack a moment with a terrible fear of what lay ahead for him and his teammate.

One last time, Neji kissed Ayano and held her tightly. Shino was saying good-bye to his family.

Tsunade stood beside the great gates of Konoha. Her expression was saddened as she watched Neji and Ayano.

"I love you." He whispered in Ayano's ear. She only cried harder as she hugged him even tighter.

Neji released his wife and glanced at Shino.

Shino nodded to Neji and the two ANBU vanished into the forest beyond Konoha's gates.

_**Goodbye…**_

Bloody had splashed the walls of the inner courtyard of the compound. Three bodies lay covered in bloody. Two were dead and one was still alive, but only just. The target had indeed been weakened, but was still stronger than most shinobi. In a moment of sacrifice, Shino had managed a devastating blow, but was killed. Neji finished what his teammate had begun and ended the fight.

Neji could hardly move. His lungs burned with every breath he took and his body screamed with agony. He gazed at Shino's lifeless body only a short distance away. His friend's face held a look of satisfaction.

Neji managed to pull a battered picture from his pocket. It was of his wife. She wore a light, silvery sun dress and a large straw hat with a pink ribbon around the top. He felt tears prickle at the corners of his eyes and his throat tighten as he gazed upon her. Never again would he see her face or hear her sweet laughter.

"Goodbye, Ayano," He managed, "I'm sorry I can't come home."

Almost as an afterthought, Neji pressed his bloodied lips against the picture. His pupil-less eyes fluttered and closed for the final time. A soft breath escaped his lips and his strong body was stilled.

_**  
Tonight, I need your sweet caress  
Hold me in the darkness  
Tonight, you calm my restlessness  
You relieve my sadness**_

"WHY???"

The pain-filled cries echoed through the streets of Konoha accompanied by the sound of shattering glass and cracking wood.

Ayano sank to her knees in what had once been an immaculately clean apartment, sobbing.

Feathers drifted down around her like snowflakes. Glass and bits of wood lay scattered about the apartment. The bedroom was in shambles. The bed sheets had been ripped from their place on the bed and shredded. The pillows were scattered in bits around the room. A lamp lay shattered on the floor from when Ayano had wrenched the covering from a table. A chair sat in pieces against the far wall where it had been flung.

"Why?"

The young woman sobbed as she clutched at two pictures. One was the picture that had been taken on the day of Ayano's marriage to Neji. The other was the picture Tsunade had given her when Neji's body had been retrieved. It was Ayano's picture with Neji's final kiss left forever upon it.

"Why did you leave me?" Tears ran down her pale face. "I need you. Neji, I need you so much." She collapsed on the floor, her head resting on the pictures. "Please, come back." Ayano fell into an exhausted sleep.

"_Ayano," A soft voice called through the mist, "Where are you?"_

_Ayano looked up to see the strong form of her husband appear in the mist. _

"_Neji?" She wiped her tears from her face. _

_Neji turned towards her and smiled tenderly at her. He held out his arms to her._

_She scrambled to her feet and ran into his embrace. "Oh, Neji!" Tears began to roll once more down her cheeks. _

"_Hush, my love. Everything's going to be all right." Neji tipped her head to look into her eyes. He kissed her. "I'm so sorry. I didn't want it to end this way. Ayano, you have so much life ahead of you. Don't leave it behind because of me. I want you to be happy more than anything."_

_Ayano hugged Neji tightly. "I just want to be with you."_

"_One day you will," He replied, "But for now, live." _

_The two held each other tightly. _

"_I'll always be here for you. I'll never leave you behind. As long as you remember me, I will be with you. I love you."_

_Neji and the mist began to fade. _

"_I love you." His voice seemed to wrap around Ayano. "Live."_

Ayano sat up and held the pictures in her trembling hands. "I will live, for you." She got to her feet and staggered slightly, but managed to right herself. With one last glance at the bedroom, Ayano left the apartment to start her life again.

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**A/N: Forgive me if this songfic isn't very well written. I just couldn't get as much emotion into it as I would have liked to. **


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